Wednesday, October 5, 2011

The Hypocrite Indian Culture

Even today we have many indian cultures where women have to hide behind either dupatta or saree or burkha. I want to ask those cultures, I am a woman and I am not ashamed of anything then why do I have to hide behind a 'Pallu'!!!
The hypocrite Indian society gives you a reason that it is for your own good. We are protecting you from the society. I just don't get it from who are you protecting women?!! If it is from some rapists then rather than asking them to hide behind a 'pallu', give them a pepper spray, enroll them in a self defense class.
There are many Indian families where women have to follow the dressing permitted by the husband's family even if they hate them from the core of their heart. Women have to stop studying further if her family wishes so. Women have to quit their job if their family wishes to and even if they wish to continue their job. And even for all of this the reason given by the families is we are taking care of the women, they don't need to work. They can stay safe and happy. We are protecting them from the outside world. If you expect women to be happy in such a situation then what was the need of India fighting for its freedom. Would the Indians be happy with the explanation that English will rule India and protect you against attacks by any other nations!!!??? Of course the answer to this was No as we saw Indians fight against the English rule. Then why is it that the 'Male Anarchy' is still allowed in India? There are millions of households where, just because man is the sole earning member of the house, women are left at their mercy. The KING - the man of the house can treat them the way he wishes!
I have to say my parents did a very good job in bringing me up when I was treated equal to my two brothers. I never had this feeling when I was growing up that my brothers are in any way dearer to my parents or are more important or they can dominate me!
But when are we going to start treating our daughters-in-law equal to our sons??!!! I think it is for the educated women to fight for the uneducated women now. It is for the mothers to fight for their daughters. Just because the mother spent her whole life on the mercy of her husband, the daughters need not do it. And I believe it is only and only women education that can empower women. It is only education that can make a woman capable of telling her husband, we are both equal in every respect and I AM PROUD OF BEING A WOMAN.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

You can't have everything!

The choices and Sacrifices you make in life define you!
You can't have everything in life!

So when things are not the way you want them to be, think is this something that i have to sacrifice to get the things that i just can't live without!

No one is perfect...everyone has some problems...
so just like people who have to deal with you have to face a few issues, you don't get everything in life as well...

Keep improving everyday and you shall be there!
Just make the choice to be happy!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

An individual is individual first before a member of the society

Except for people who are really true at heart you would rarely find anyone who is not an individual first before being a mother or father or brother or sister or friend or employee or manager or customer etc.
I used to think mother or father is your true friend but what i have learnt after wedding is that mother and father also have their personal motives before the motives of their children. Although I would still not deny the fact that mother and father are the best well wishers i can get in the whole world but when it comes to individualism, no one is behind unless someone is like my father and is true to his heart. Really black and white in his behaviour. Ofcourse I know my parents won't do anything bad for me but when it will come to taking advantage from something that doesn't hurt you badly. They will and this being the milder example i guess.
I guess thats the reason why a husband and wife become more close later. They have common goals and motives so they have more to wish or work together for.
Well i am true to my heart, now i guess i need to learn to mind what you say and do! Things have to be thought through is it? I have started doing it to some extent in my work, but i guess i have to do it at more detailed level while talking to everyone. I guess this is the biggest learning from Onsite experience!

Happiness is just a matter of choice

When you are young you have lots of goals, life is very exciting, you have lots of new things to look forward to. At first it is education, then finding a job, then getting hikes and promotions etc. Small things like good grades, any other achievement, appreciation by your manager and fun with friends keep you happy. In School if you have long and boring vacation it feels like you are dead bored. Even if for 2 months you don't have many friends to play with, you start to say life is dull and boring right now.

And when you think about getting married or settling down it sounds like bad idea! I always used to wonder what will I do in my married life??!! I will surely get bored. What will happen after you have kids!? Yeah first few years might be exciting but after a few years, I surely will get bored of the hectic routines of taking care of kids and managing your job, household etc.

Finally I got married and in 8-9 months itself I started getting a feeling that the routine is boring. Of course marriage brings its own nice things but as a wife or husband you have a responsibility towards the other person which does make you busy and hence the routine comes into picture. After 10 months I happened to travel abroad and luckily to a very good location. You can call it one of the best possible onsite locations for any consultant. When I landed in that city everything was really exciting, everything was new and I used to be happy just because I was in that city. After 3 months of staying there, everything in the city became normal for me. There was nothing that was new or exciting for me. So I was no more in my happy mood. Things felt like a pain, daily routine felt like such a burden.

That is exactly when it occurred to me that - I am in one of the best cities of the world, I have a really nice job, handsome salary, a happy married life, loving siblings and parents. I have enough of outings, adventures and fun. Basically I don't have anything that I can complain about! But still I am bored of the daily routine of going to work and managing a small household! That is when i realized life is not going to have new things for you every second! There are going to be routines, there are going to be similar things for at least small duration in your life. You will have to do the same job for few years! You will have to live the same hectic life for some time! And it is just a matter of choice that you will do it happily or will you want to crib and do it with a bad mood.

So it is up to you, you can choose to be happy about things and you can choose to take each day as a new beginning, you can get excited about very small things and be happy! You can choose to be cheerful and jolly doing the same job! It is just a matter of choice!